I just finished cooking myself some dinner. I made myself an Italian sausage spaghetti and had a nice glass of wine with it. As I get older, I get more excited for the time I have by myself. It's really where I get to focus on me and find out what excites and fuels me right now in my life.
I just started taking hip hop again this past Monday. Let's just say I wasn't having the best day and I was really looking forward to class. It was my first dance class in over six months and I was so intimidated and scared because the class is full of regulars and people with a dance background. I, on the other hand have no background in dance and many times I said to myself, you should just leave or you're embarrassing yourself... but then my higher self kicked in and said NO, shut up and just do it!! I'm proud to say I didn't quit and here is the lesson I gained from it: WE HAVE to follow our creative impulses in spite of being scared and not be so quick to quit on ourselves because you can end up pleasantly surprising yourself. I've always loved to dance because I LOVE music. The moment music comes on I just want to sing or move my body. I love getting lost in the world of music. In fact, I started playing the guitar and singing more this past week and I didn't let my negative self talk rob me from my joyful experience. I sang my little heart out and was unapologetically myself and I can't tell you how liberating and fulfilling it felt to do that.
I found a quote yesterday that really resonated with me: "Most answers reveal themselves through doing, not thinking." This change in my own thought process is already proving to be so beneficial. I can either sit on the couch or get lost on instagram and start thinking how I wish I could be a better dancer or a better singer or a better actress OR I could actually get out there and practice and fail and then fail better. Get used to taking action even if that means failing. At least you know that you're really trying and in my opinion really living. You can pat yourself on the back for having the courage and willingness to pursue what you are curious about when most people are too afraid to try. I think that's what builds character and gives you confidence, joy, strength and clarity.
This is where I stand today. I am grateful for who I am and who I am becoming and I'm excited to share my continual journey and growth with you.
